So for the past few weeks, I've been watching loads of documentaries. I think I was just lazy to study and I like watching TV so I just put them together so I felt less unproductive hehe.
But watching all those documentaries just made me worry. A lot.
I've been writing an essay on Malthus' population theory, which is basically: as population grows exponentially and the means of subsistence arithmetically, one day the world will just run out of food and people will die blahblah.. so watching those stupid documentaries just amplified my worries even more.
There was one about the food we eat and how unhealthy we were. I went to Whole Foods the next day. My diet now consists of nuts, prunes for antioxidants, more tuna and less take aways (that's a lie).
Then I watched one about paedophilic priests (don't ask -___-) and started worrying about my own children (next time lah). First the food, now horny priests? I decided to stop watching them for awhile. Who knows, if I watch March of the Penguins, I'll even feel sad for birds.
Yesterday, during tutorial, my tutor was telling us how to finish off our environmental essays and he said that it was okay to conclude with a bunch of questions, it was okay NOT to have a conclusion - we don't know all the answers and we don't know all the circumstances (super lightbulb moment - never thought I'd get enlightened in school -__-).
I have a lot of questions I want answered and a lot of doubts I want reassured. I know everyone does too. After much worrying over my children being molested, me starving to death, catching bird/swine/panda flu, dying in war, etc... I realised, WHAT'S THE POINT?
I told my sister about my new diet and she was like, "Yesterday, I went to Subway and they asked me what sauce I wanted. I said - EVERYTHING". Hehe.
What I'm trying to say is, whatever we worry about.. it may or may not happen. If it does, it will come sooner or later. It's okay to be uncertain, it's okay to not have all the answers.
Wow, now that I'm reading it out loud - seriously, wtf was I worrying for.
auf wiedersehn goodbye.
